I was at a meeting a while ago where a lady was quite frustrated with herself.
She was not frustrated because she wasn't losing weight...she had actually lost a lot and was a "lifetime" Weight Watchers member. She was frustrated with herself because she needed weekly support to get there and stay there.
She had been going to meetings for years and really felt that by now she should "get it". She should be able to do it on her own and that her inability to do so was a failure.
Unfortunately, in my opinion, the leader she spoke to (it was not my leader) gave what I feel was a very wrong response.
She suggested that the lady try coming once a month instead of weekly. Perhaps that was all the support she needed, and she would feel better about it.
I never saw that lady again.
I used to be a bit like her. I valued my friendships but ultimately I wanted to do everything on my own. If I did it on my own my successes were mine and my failures were seen by no-one.
I don't know when it happened but at some point I became the opposite person. As this blog will attest to, I thrive on support.
I suppose I have to be totally honest and also say I thrive on attention. I wouldn't be doing this blog if I didn't now would I?
The correct answer, in my opinion, would be that there is absolutely nothing wrong with needing support, and going out and getting the support you need to succeed is a sign of strength and not weakness. I believe this with all my heart.
So today I want to say a big thank you to all of you for all of the support I have received from you.
I also want to encourage those who are going it alone to find a better way. It is just too hard.
I am not saying you won't succeed. A good friend of mine has lost a tremendous amount of weight on her own and kept it off for years. I think it is a rare exception though. Most of us need support to do it, and we need support even more to maintain it.
So if you are doing this alone find a friend, a colleague, a group....anything. It makes life easier.
This blog can indeed be your group...as long as you keep coming back, participating, and communicating your successes and set backs. Commitment is critical.
If you have been contemplating starting your own journey, I say...it's time to start. Don't wait until a decline in health forces the journey.
Be healthy!
Alan
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2 comments:
Hey Alan, I have to start by saying I've been away from my own computer for a bit so have had to read back a few days and get caught up. I can't believe you drank wine that tasted bad! Organic or not, if its gross, its gross! Glad to see that you're feeling better now.
I totally agree with the need for support but I am much more of a 'closet' dieter (okay, bad choice of words) because I can't stand it when the people around you become the diet police and you start getting the "Should you be eating that??" Drives me crazy.
I have lost enough weight that people have noticed but if anyone actually asks me how, I tell them I'm exercising and tracking what I eat, not that I'm on a diet. I will make my choices but I hate it when there is a fuss made about not making something for a family dinner or an event because of me. I know that WW is always talking about asking for help / support but to me the meeting is that and I don't really talk about it outside of that room. I guess I might also have to admit that if I tell anyone I'm doing that, then they are looking for results and if they didnt' happen it might be seen as failure.
So, this is another support for me and I thank you for that. A little something that helps get me through the week until the next meeting. I missed last week, and was sorry I wasn't there to see Carolyn get her lifetime. I just hope it isn't that long before I get mine back again.
Hopefully I will see you tomorrow night. Car repair issues might keep me from getting there but I am going to try.
Take care,
M. WW.
Re the wine: Yes I am an idiot. I still felt a little quirky this morning but think all is good now.
I don't think one necessarily has to be "out there" announcing to the world (like me LOL) to get support. As long as we can find it in our own way then life is good. Just by going to WW you have built in support and you are certainly supporting me!
Bit I bit I will narrow down who you are. I know know you are not Carolyn.
I thought I knew who you were but the person who I though you were asked me a question a few weeks ago that made it clear she had not read my blog...when I knew you had...unless of course you were simply trowing me off track :-)
Alan
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