You Are Perfect

Hi All!

This is a bit of a "Part 2" to my blog titled "You Are Beautiful".

The message is the same. You are perfect and you are beautiful.

Why I am I writing about the same thing? Because I can't get this song out of my head. It touches too close to home and I know it touches the hearts of a lot of us who have gone through life with weight issues and/or other issues and all the prejudice associated with it.

The lyrics are below:

Pink – F**kin’ Perfect (Clean Version) Lyrics

Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That’s alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, missunderstood
Miss, no way it’s all good
It didn’t slow me down
Mistaken
Always second guessing
Underestimated
Look, I’m still around…

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you’re nothing
You are perfect to me

You’re so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you’ll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It’s enough
I’ve done all i can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you do the same

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you’re nothing
You are perfect to me

The whole world stares while i swallow the fear
The only thing i should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and we tried tried tried
But we try too hard, it’s a waste of my time
Done looking for the critics, cuz they’re everywhere
They don’t like my genes, they don’t get my hair
Strange ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?

Ooh, pretty pretty pretty,
Pretty pretty please don’t you ever ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel
Like you’re nothing
you are perfect to me
You’re perfect
You’re perfect to me
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you’re less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you’re nothing
you are perfect to me

There really isn't much for me to say that can top the words of this song.

The bottom line it that we are all on a journey. It doesn't matter where we are on that journey...love yourself now.

Be healthy!

Alan

P.S The video of this song can be viewed at: 

Listen to the Video/Song here

YOU ARE PERFECT!!!

I Weighed In

In yesterday's blog I was trying to decide whether or not I would weigh in at Weight Watchers. I decided to do it and I am 204 pounds. That is exactly the weight I said I though I was on Monday.

It still freaks me out that 204 pounds is possible for me without looking excessively overweight. Working out is good.

I am thinking that I am going to compromise on the weight thing. I am going to weigh in like a good boy and have Weight Watchers record it weekly but unless I am really feeling out of control I am going to tell them I only want them to tell me my weight once a month. 

It is the best of both worlds. I can review my situation on a monthly basis while keeping it honest and shifting the focus away from the scale. I am liking this concept.

On another note I got inspired by Marilyn Dennis on the radio yesterday. She was talking about portion control but not in the sense that we normally think of. She wasn't talking so much about how much is on the plate but was referring to how much goes in the mouth at a time.

I think a lot of people with weight issues (myself included) are fast eaters...and we tend to have large "bite" sizes. 

I know I do...especially when I am hungry. So for this week I am going to try and focus on how much I am actually putting in my mouth at a time. 

Tomorrow may be my last blog for a little while but I promise I will not be going AWOL on you again. I am having laser eye surgery done Friday afternoon so it may be a few days before I can see clearly and even if I can I am supposed to limit my exposure to the computer etc. for a bit.

Whether you like it or not though...I will be back!

Be healthy!

Alan

To Weigh Or Not To Weigh?

Today is weigh in day at Weight Watchers.

As a lifetime member I am only required to weigh in once a month but they encourage you to weigh in once a week.

My dilemma is this: My weight is not going down and it may even have gone up a couple of pounds, but the shape of my body is, yet again, changing.

I had developed a bit of a tummy again with my last weight gain but since starting bootcamp May 30th (which I combine with strength training three times a week) I have noticed a slight weight increase but the stomach is shrinking and the shirts are fitting better. I think this can only be good.

The tummy isn't completely gone but I seriously wonder if there is value in doing a weigh-in. Being told I am "up" has such negative connotations but at this point in my journey it actually may not be a bad thing.

Very confused about this one...not sure what I will do when I get there...we will see.


Be healthy!

Alan

You Are Beautiful

Are you on a journey for health? If you are really being honest with yourself...are you? If you are I salute you!

If I am being honest I am on a journey that includes health as a very important piece (and an amazing side benefit), but it is really a journey of vanity. It is a journey that I hope results in my looking the best I possibly can.

Don't get me wrong. I am under no illusion that I will look twenty again. I am approaching 50...looking 40 is ok with me.

I doubt I am alone.

For the those of us on the journey TOWARD vanity it makes me wonder what we thing of ourselves NOW? Do we think we are are beautiful (or handsome) NOW or do we hope we will be one day?

When I look around at the beautiful people I have met on this journey it makes me realize that we are all beautiful...inside and out.

I don't think there is anything wrong with striving to look better...but we need to make sure we tell ourselves that we are also perfect just the way we are.

People in this world can be cruel and comments can hurt. Even adults can be cruel...they just tend to be better at being "subtly cruel".

When those moments come remember the lyrics of this awesome song:

"I am beautiful no matter what they say
Words can't bring me down
I am beautiful in every single way
Yes, words can't bring me down
So don't you bring me down today" 


Be healthy and enjoy this first day of summer!


Alan

Making The Connection...For Real

Do you believe there is a connection between food and the way we feel? Of course you do. We all do. We say it all the time.

The real question is do you pay close attention to that connection between food and the way you feel?

It is easy when you overeat and suddenly feel gross...but what about when it is more subtle?

I was doing my Bootcamp session this morning when my friend started talking about how she had been out the night before and almost everything she ate involved bad carbs. She could really notice the difference in her work out.

I was thinking that my workout was different too. It wasn't that is was harder (although it was hard)...it was that my breathing was different. When I run outside I always get out of breath quickly but today there was a wheezing sound along with the "out of breath" sound.

I wondered if it was directly related to the chemicals etc. in my "end of the night binge" last night.

We had eaten well all day and had a delicious fish with Salad for dinner but then Jamie had a craving for a treat.

It was my fault really. We had Cheese Doritos and Coke stored downstairs (left over from our recent party).  I brought them up and said to Jamie: "It's your call...we can open them or not." I was fully prepared to abide by whatever decision he made but I knew damn well that if I set them in front of him they would be opened...and they were...and we ate.

I had no immediate negative repercussions and I felt fine this morning...but then I got this wheezing sound in my breath while working out.

I can't say for sure if it is related to last night's snacks or not but I suspect it is.

So now I hope to focus on my reactions to foods more instead of paying lip service to the connection between food and the way we eat.

If I can establish a direct correlation it may help me avoid the bad stuff.

Be healthy!

Alan

Boot Camp

Hi all!

Boot Camp has been my new thing this month. When I blogged a while ago that I was struggling and needed to find something new to re-motivate me, a good friend of mine suggested I try Boot Camp. It took me a few months to actually do it but I have been doing it since the end of May and am really enjoying it.

Boot Camp made me realize that I am really not as fit as I thought I was. In a gym I can lift pretty heavy weights and I could go on the elliptical for two hours if I want to no problem, but get me running around a park touching trees and I am out of breath in approximately sixty seconds. The difference is amazing.

Don't get me wrong. I am NOT knocking the gym. I actually get quite frustrated when exercise encouragement is presented with statements like " You don't have to go to the gym...or get on the 'dreadmill' to exercise". It is a true statement but it puts down a form of exercise that many people actually love doing...myself included. I like the gym.

Boot Camp, however, adds a new element to my activity and confuses my body a bit more. I am not sure if I am losing weight because of it but I "feel" more fit.

Essentially at 6:00AM Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I show up at a park where we do a mixture of cardio and strength exercise. The only apparatus used are a tension band, a yoga mat, and your own body. For one hour I am challenged. I will run until my heart rate is high, then continue exercising with strength type exercise that allow you to continue exercising while your heart rate drops a bit, and then as soon as you just start to feel like you can breath again...you are once again off to the races. The sessions are great and being outside for them is really nice.

They sessions are held in month long packages and this package ends on June 24th. On the day it ends I am also having laser eye surgery and I am not sure how long it will be before I am back to normal so I don't think I will join for the month of July.

My friend Andres wants to give it a shot though so if he is up for it maybe I will do it again in August.

One thing it has taught me is that I need to do more cardio that is not equipment based. \

Our gym has various exercise classes and I will be doing more of those for sure.

Have a great Father's Day...and be healthy!

Alan

P.S: The website for Boot Camp is: http://www.bestbodybootcamp.com/

Here we go again!

Hello my blog friends!

Sorry I have been gone so long.

I wish I could tell you something specific happened that kept me from blogging but there was no one specific thing. I could say I got busy but I have done it when I am busy before. I could say I ran out of things to say...and there is truth in that...but life is still here and things are still happening so there are things to write about.

Perhaps it was because I started feeling like less of an inspiration. I have struggled for months now so I have not really been in a position to "lead by example".

Leading by example has never really been the primary purpose of the blog though. I am happy when I can do that, but it has been about sharing struggles and realizing we are not alone.

The reality is I NEED this blog and I need you. You keep me "aware".

Now getting down to the weight thing. I have to tell you I am a bit confused.

From a scale perspective it is not good. I am 204 pounds now and when I reached my goal I was 176 pounds. The thing is though, I don't feel like I used to feel at 204 pounds. Most of my shirts fit too.

I know there is some tummy there that I would like to lose but there is also a lot more muscle that I didn't possess the last time I was this weight.

The problem is I feel comfortable. Maybe that is not a problem...I don't know. It is hard to lose weight when overall you feel comfortable at the weight you are at.

Am I going to try and lose the tummy? Yes. Am I going to stress myself out about it? No. This is what I have been saying to myself.

Sounds good right? The problem is it lacks motivation and when I lack motivation I tend to go up rather than stay the same or go down.

So I am trying to find ways to re-motivate myself to lose the weight...again.

One of these ways has been through a program called "Boot Camp". Will write about this tomorrow.

Have a great weekend everyone. I missed you!

Be healthy!

Alan

Happy Birthday To Me

I couldn't NOT do a blog today. It's my birthday!

I realized last year that birthdays are meant to be celebrated because there are too many gone from this world who no longer get this luxury.

So I am going to celebrate every one I have the pleasure of enjoying.

It is great to get birthday wishes from friends. It reminds you you are loved...and we all need that.

I am so very grateful for the wonderful people in my life.

It would be hard to find better friends.

You all mean so much to me.

The day has been great. Well..it started yesterday with a great birthday celebration for my friend Cara, and then went on to a Karaoke night at a pub with more wonderful friends (I do not sing). Just after midnight (the official start of my birthday) the whole bar started singing "Bye Bye Miss American Pie" which was a song my sister Shirley used to sing before she passed away. I like to think it was her way of saying Happy Birthday :-)

Today I slept in ( a little hung over but not a lot) , then Jamie took me for lunch and shopping (bought four shirts), then came home, had a nap. then finalized a real estate deal, and we are off for birthday dinner soon. I am not worrying about what I eat today.

What a GREAT day!

Loy you all!

Alan