Wow That Was Intense

What an intense weekend of training.

When I signed up to be a leader for Weight Watchers I didn't really take into account the preparation involved.

I simply thought: "I already attend one meeting a week so why not lead one meeting a week instead" It is the same time commitment right? Well...yes...it is...when I factor in the time that I do not have to spend driving to Burlington and back every week...but that is only after the training has been completed.

It is kind of a two edged sword. On the one hand there is a fair amount of time commitment (since most of us also have full time jobs) as there are three WW Leader Webinars including one really designed for leaders doing "At Work" meetings, two full days of in class leader training, and five receptionist training sessions (although we are not receptionists we have to know what they do as we are in charge of the whole meeting and we may have to help out from time to time). On the other hand...it doesn't feel like there is enough training before you hit the ground running...I guess one probably never feels like there is enough training. I do feel like I have all the information that they can possibly give me so I guess they are right...it's time.

In my case I am joining the WW team at the same time the annual Spring Training for all leaders happens, so I will have that training June 1st as well...it's all good...just time consuming.

I am looking forward to Wednesday being over. Then I will have done my first meeting and can take a little bit of a deep breath.

In the training on the weekend I had to prepare and deliver a WW meeting to the Trainer and to the Territory Manager. We all had to do this and it was a very supportive atmosphere. If I am doing a totally honest evaluation of myself I think I did really well...but I had one big issue. I was WAY too nervous. I think I would rather have any other type of issue. If it was an issue of product knowledge etc I could fix it. When the problem is nervousness, even thinking about it will just make me more nervous...so I don't really know what to do about that one.

From the perspective of the Trainer and Territory Manager I don't think they were concerned at all. I think they were thinking "He ran a great meeting and after a couple of meetings the nervousness will subside and he will be fine"...so they are happy. But from my perspective it is not so simple. The last thing I want to be is nervous in my FIRST meeting. Oh well...it is what it is I guess.

So two more days and then the big day arrives. I feel like I am making too big a deal of it but it does feel like a big deal to me. Over the past eight years I have had two of the best leaders there are at WW so it kind of feels like I have a lot to live up to.

Deep breaths....I will get there.

At least all this WW stuff is keeping me very mindful of what I eat.

Be healthy!

Alan

Sometimes a door has to close for another one to open

"For every ending there is a new beginning"..."For every door that closes another door opens"...and my favourite from T.S. Elliot..."What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from".

This week will mark an "end". It makes me sad to think it.

It is hard for me to imagine that after driving to Burlington from Toronto almost every Wednesday since 2004 this Wednesday I will be making that drive for the final time.

I have driven there faithfully virtually every week for my Weight Watchers meetings since 2004 and over the years I have made such wonderful friends. There is even a couple that goes to the meeting that has been attending since I first joined WW back in the late 1980s. It will be hard to leave on Wednesday.

Sometimes, however, one cannot begin their path down a new road without leaving the road they are on, and it is time for me to take a new path.

In the first week after this Wednesday I will "shadow" a Weight Watchers leader in Toronto, attend WW training, and then the following week I will begin my own Wednesday night Weight Watchers meetings here in Toronto as a leader.

It is exciting...but right now it all seems a little bit surreal.

Of course I am worried about the first day I have to get up in front of my new group (which is May 2nd). Last week I snuck in and sat in on the meeting I will soon lead. The group seems like a good one so that makes me happy...but there is always the fear of falling flat on your face.

Obviously I want to "look" my best when I get up in front of my group for the first time to so I am diligently following the Weight Watchers plan. That doesn't mean I can't have treats...I will probably have some wine tonight...but I will count the points and stay on plan.

I am also tracking my points by methods I don't usually use. I am tracking on e-tools as well as on a paper tracker and on the points plus calculator. Once I am a leader I will have to help people who track in different manners so I need to ensure I am up-to-date on every method.

I'm really excited about my new group but man am I going to miss my old friends.

If any of my friends in the Burlington Hamilton area (you don't need to be a member of WW) are reading this and are free this Wednesday we are going to go for drinks after my last meeting at the Kelseys on Guelph line (behind the Zellers in Burlington Mall). We will get there about 6:50pm Wednesday and all are welcome.

I'm just hoping I don't cry Wednesday...I am such a frickin sap.

Be healthy!

Alan

Finally I'm back...was the vacation weight worth it?

Back in February I went on a week-long cruise and gained over 10 pounds.

To many that may sound as though I lived my week in the Buffet line but I really didn't.

On the cruise I chose not to have dessert, skipped the big breakfasts, drank less alcohol (I really don't drink that much on vacations), and had a normal lunch. I guess the only real "splurge" was that I did order whatever appealed to me at dinner every night. Nonetheless...it was three meals out a day with no control over how they are cooked and I gain weight at mega speeds.

In the past I have always kind of had the philosophy that I can handle a weeks worth of damage. If I am going away for a week...I don't worry about it. If I am going away for two weeks I tell myself I need to be good, and I usually am for a week...and then I fall apart.

No matter what the scenario is, as soon as I return home I tell myself it was worth it (well...with the exception of the time I gained 21 pounds in two weeks). Life is meant to be enjoyed, and all I need to do is get back on track as soon as I return home right?

After my last vacation I told myself the same thing. It was worth it. I had a great time, and I gained ten pounds...so what?!

It is now seven weeks later and as of yesterday I have returned to my pre-vacation weight.

I cannot help but wonder at this point if it really was worth it.

Seven weeks of being on a weight loss regime to correct one week of fun? Was it REALLY worth it?

Right now my head is thinking a resounding NO...it was not worth it.

I know myself though, and by the next time I go on vacation I will probably be thinking it is totally worth it.

I am not sure which answer is the right answer but one thing is clear to me: If we decide that we are on "vacation" and it is time to just forget about the world and do what we want we can have a great time...but there is a big price to be paid upon return.  Taking off the weight isn't as easy as it was when I was younger.

I don't think there will be any more vacations until 2013 now so I will have a while to reflect on this. I am hoping I will be smarter next time.

Be healthy,

Alan

Sometimes I am never satisfied

Do you ever want MORE? I am like that. I want MORE.

I have no reason to want more. If I keep what I have I should be pretty damned happy.

I have been feeling that way with weight loss this week. I am not always perfect...but this week...I have been perfect. I have stayed within my daily points range for Weight Watchers, I have elected not to eat any of my "optional" points, and I have exercised every day except for one, planned, rest day. I have not even had an alcoholic drink since my "weight watchers week" started Thursday morning. In a nut shell...I have been perfect.

The results I wanted to achieve will be there when I step on the scale at Weight Watchers this week. In my last blog I said that my goal was to be 189 pounds by this Wednesday and and then 185 pounds by April 25th.

I will be 189 pounds by this Wednesday. That is my pre-vacation weight so I should feel happy right? I am perfectly on track.

The problem is that with perfect eating I expect consistent results. If I eat perfectly for a day I expect to wake up the next morning...be able to step on the scale...and see that it was all worth it. I want weight loss for EVERY day I am perfect. It only makes sense doesn't it?

Sadly, our bodies don't always follow the rules. They are like kids...sometimes they just don't listen.

I guess this is why Weight Watchers says that during the "weight loss" mode of the program it is ideal to only weigh in once a week at the meeting. That way we only see the end result of a weeks worth of eating and not the frustrations of going up and down daily.

I obey the Weight Watchers suggestion sometimes...but this week I haven't and it is frustrating as hell. Even though I am exactly where I want to be right now I feel like "good" is not "good enough". I WANT MORE!

It is sheer stupidity and a total "dieter" mentality.

I am making a lifestyle change...I am not dieting...and I need to learn that once and for all.

I get it most of the time...just not this week.

Hopefully I will wake up and smell the roses soon....I usually do know I am being an idiot when I am being one...it just doesn't always stop me.

Be healthy!

Alan