This Is It. For Good.

The day of reckoning has come. It is time, once and for all, to put processed foods behind me and lead a healthy life.

I am tired of flip flopping. I am tired of the weight gain and loss roller coaster. I am tired of writing a blog that is supposed to be inspirational and then failing miserably.

I have been bad lately. Scratch that...I have been abysmal. I have also been pretty invisible on this blog. I guess the two go hand in hand.

I have every excuse in the book...and they are all valid. I did two jobs while Jamie was away, and then the day after he got back I started covering for a colleague who was on vacation so I have done two jobs until tonight, and I have been taking a course at the Institute of Holistic Nutrition. I have barely had time to sleep let alone eat. Monday and Tuesday I really didn't even have time to sleep.

So I made my choices...and they were my choices. I ate burgers out, had chips and coke, had egg salad sandwiches purchased from supermarkets at lunch, and enjoyed Pizza. I also haven't made it to a Weight Watchers meeting in five weeks.

What is the result? I am up about twenty pounds.

I am not depressed...just tired. Tired of getting myself in this situation. I don't feel good.

How ironic is it that I eat crap while spending my spare time studying Nutrition? It is ridiculous.

So this is it. It is time...once and for all...to practice what I learn.

Will I still go out for dinner? Of course. Will I be perfect? Of course not. Will I be as close to perfect as I possibly can while making sure I am not making myself miserable? Absolutely.

So here is to new beginnings and here is to new beginnings once and for all. No more "starting over".

This is it my friends.

The time has come.

I am hoping you will come on this final journey with me if you are not already there.

Be healthy!

I will.

Alan 

Feeling Challenged and Finding a Solution

Hey all!

I think most of you know that Jamie left on a an emergency visit to Singapore for three and a half weeks as his mother went into hospital. The good news is she has returned home and is doing well.

I have found things quite challenging in his absence. Doing his job on top of mine is time consuming and when you add in the fact that part of his job involves making breakfasts that are not very healthy it isn't easy. I don't make these breakfast regularly so between the overall lack of time and my desire to ensure everything tastes ok I am finding myself eating the breakfasts. This has to stop.

Today is the first day after labour day so summer is over...it has to stop now.

It doesn't look like the schedule is going to lighten up any so I have decided to spend a little money and make my life easier until he returns on the 25th.

I have called "Fuel Nutrition" which is a company that delivers healthy food to your door every morning and asked them to deliver food to me for the next 13 business days (they only deliver Monday to Friday). That will ensure I am eating really good food without having to think.

It is money I didn't really want to spend but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

I am trying to fight off a cold right now but don't think I am winning the battle. Feeling all congested this morning (which is why I am up at 4:30 in the morning).

To my friends at WW I am afraid I won't be there Wednesday night as I have to be home to check a guest in to the B&B.

If you are off track, it is time to get yourself back on track given that labour day has passed and the summer "season" is over. :-). Today is the day.

Be healthy!

Alan

Three and a half weeks of food

Ok I am now officially in charge of running a B&B for three and a half weeks.

Jamie's mom took ill in Singapore and he left on a flight this afternoon to go take care of her. She is still in hospital but she will be fine.

Obviously all that really matters is Jamie's Mom but the ripple effect is that the next three and a half weeks I will be running the B&B on top of doing my Real Estate job and September is always our busiest month of the year for the B&B. It is a pretty busy month for Real Estate too.

You can't get accommodation anywhere in Toronto in September because of things like the Toronto International Film Festival and Jamie likes to capitalize on it, so every September we give up our own bedroom, rent that out as well... and we sleep in the office.

So here I sit...in my office...where I will remain...because there are three guests in my bedroom right now.

If only that were as fun as it sounds :-)

So tomorrow I will be up at 6:00AM making stacked pancakes layered with fruits and almond slices and syrup...sounds yummy doesn't it? Only problem is I can't eat it.

That is the way it is going to be for the next three and half weeks...delicious food (well at least I hope it is delicious) right in front of me every morning and I can't have it.

Can you say "Challenge"?

Be healthy,

Alan

In a bit of shock right now

I just received some sad news that I wanted to share with my friends who go to WW with me.

I am afraid that John Millar from our group passed away last night.

I don't know many details other than he had a pain in his ear and ended up in hospital. He then slipped into a coma for a day or so and passed away.

I can't say I knew John really well but always enjoyed seeing him in Weight Watchers.

While almost everyone said "hi" at the meeting, John always said "Hi Alan". I know that is a silly little thing but it is a silly little thing I always noticed. It somehow had more meaning, especially since I can never remember anyone's names.

He had been a longtime follower of our leader Cindy. Meeting her first at "WW at Work" meetings at Dofasco and then joining our Wednesday night group.

I will miss John.

It is yet again a reminder that our lives are too short to mess around with. We must enjoy every minute we can and take care of ourselves so we have as many minutes as possible.

Rest in Peace John.

Be healthy,

Alan

Getting Back In The Swing Of Things

OK I am back...at least I hope I am.

I am eating well, exercising regularly, and have registered for two more courses at the Institute of Holistic Nutrition.

I am going to try and do things a little differently this time though and make it my goal to lose weight as slowly as possible.

I can lose weight quickly but in the long run it just doesn't work for me...I gain it back just as quickly.

If I lose it slowly it will take me longer to lose it and hopefully by the time I will have established better eaten habits.

That is the theory at least.

So here we go again....onward and downward :-)

Be healthy,

Alan

Posting The Picture

Ok I am keeping my promise of yesterday. I don't particularly like where I am "at" right now but the first step toward changing what you don't like is facing what you don't like.

So here they are...the pics of my current body:

Can I live with where my weight is? Yes.

Do I feel good where my weight is? No.

I don't really need the pictures to tell me to get my act together...the way I feel is already telling me. I don't feel healthy.

The good news is I am on the road to recovery once again. Yesterday and today were good days and tomorrow is going to be even better.

I am going to force myself to be good until I actually feel like I WANT to be good again.

As I said yesterday, sometimes waiting around for motivation simply doesn't work.

Be healthy!

Alan

Motivation

Do you ever lose your motivation to continue?

I do, I have, and I have been there for a while.

It isn't a case of giving up as much as it is a case of getting comfortable with where I am.

Being comfortable is good right?

Perhaps...but perhaps not. It depends on whether or not it is an excuse. In my case it is an excuse.

I say I am happy where I am but then I get up in the morning and look in the mirror and I feel disappointed instead of happy. I think about how I feel inside and I don't have that "bouncy" feeling of health...I have the weighed down feeling of food.

I am NOT comfortable where I am. It is just easier to think I am.

Finding the motivation to restart is hard when you tell yourself you are comfortable. I need to re-find that motivation.

Even my lack of blogging is primarily due to a lack of motivation. I say I am busy but I could have time....if I wanted to.

So I need to turn things around and remotivate myself.

I will start with affirmations. Just stopping a few times a day and telling myself I can do this. I will also do my best to keep my commitments even though they are way past due date.

I haven't posted a picture of myself shirtless on this blog in ages even though I have promised several times. I will take that picture today and post it tomorrow. It won't be pretty...but I will do it.

The only way to remotivate oneself is to start doing the right things. Sometimes motivation doesn't come from within. Sometimes you have to force yourself in the early stages.

It is time for me to force myself.

Be healthy!

Alan