A DAY TO VALUE LIFE!

Hi all!

I know I have said this a million times but I really do hope to get back to regular blogging soon. Things are just so busy lately!

I have been reasonably good (after being bad) so I am not where I want to be weight-wise but it is going down again. I will take a picture on the 12th and post it on the 13th regardless of what my weight is at the time. I have to get back to forcing myself to stay in check.

I couldn't let today go by without posting a message though.

Today is the anniversary of the passing of two people who touched my life immensely. The first is my friend Kelly who passed away August 8th, 1978. She wasn't afraid to be my friend when I was young and no-one else would because I didn't "fit in". I will miss her forever and my heart goes out to her family on this day. Time may help us cope but it certainly does not heal all wounds.

The other is my sister Shirley. She passed away from Ovarian Cancer ten years ago today at the age of 47. I am still having trouble grasping the fact that my life is now longer than hers was. We were a lot alike, I think, and I miss her so.

When one lives with the memories of someone who is no longer here, I think one really begins to understand how precious every day of our life is...and how important it is to have as many "days" as possible. Shirley and Kelly were not as fortunate as us.

We are here, and, to a certain extent it is within our power to stay here.  It is also within our power to be happy. Life is about choice. Let's make sure we make the right ones. I would like to be blogging to you when I am 97.

Be healthy,

Alan

P.S. Shirley's daughters are organizing a team to walk in Shirley's memory at the Ovarian Cancer Walk of Hope. Jamie and I will be walking. If you would like to sponsor either one of us, click on either of the links below. Thank you in advance for your support:

To Sponsor Jamie Click Here:

Donate in Shirley's Memory via Jamie

To Sponsor Alan Click Here:

Donate in Shirley's Memory via Alan

Well that was brutal

Just went through a really rough caffeine withdrawal..but I survived.

I started doing a cleanse that required no caffeine and I figured this was as good a time as any to finally buckle down and kick the habit.

The problem was a cleanse is supposed to release everything and it seemed to me that taking any medication to deal with the withdrawal headaches would have the opposite effect. It would suppress rather than release. So it had to be done drug free.

I have to tell you if you don't think caffeine is an addiction...try going off it. I was in agony. The headaches were so bad I was debilitated for 24 hours and vomited three times. I was withdrawing from a serious addiction just like any other addiction.

After the first 24 hours things got better and I had a mild headache for another 24 hours but now the headache is pretty much gone.

So the caffeine withdrawal is done but the cravings still linger on. I would kill for a coffee right now.

I know I can have decaf but want to break the habit of automatically needing coffee every morning so I will force myself not too.

Will have a decaf tea later in the day though.

Be healthy!

Alan

A Message For The Wednesday Night WW Meeting Group

Hi all.

Going though major caffein withdrawal today so won't write much. Head is absolutely pounding. Will blog about it tomorrow.

My cousin Barb called today and asked me to post a message of the blog.

Apparently after I left last week a group of people discussed going to Botanical Gardens Jazz festival after tomorrow'a meeting.

Barb looked into it and she says it is a "go" for all who want to attend but it isn't free. Entry is $13 or $10 for seniors.

Barb says if you want to go, bering a salad and paper plate etc with you and people can head over after the meeting. The Jazz festival runs from 6:30pm - 8:30pm.

If you can't make it tomorrow (like I can't) Barb says not to worry. We can do it again in a couple of weeks.

Be healthy,

Alan

STARING DOWN THE CHOCOLATE

There is a delicious chocolate covered cookie three feet away from me. There used to be six.

We had a return B&B guest bring us a box of the most delicious chocolate cookies I have ever had in my life. Yes I had one...ok ok...I had two...yesterday. Oh my god....soooooo good.

One remains. It is on Jamie's desk but he isn't here and I feel like there is an invisible force pulling me toward it...it feels like I have no choice...it wants me....and I want it...we were meant to be one.

That is how I am feeling as I type this.

It is also the attitude that got me fat in the first place. The feeling that food and I were meant to be.

It is all a lie.

That chocolate cookie is going to make love to me and then attach itself to me and never let go. It will follow me everywhere I am and make me miserable. It will do everything it can to sap the energy out of me so I just feel like lying around at home instead of going to the gym where I might find something better. It is a manipulative self-serving cookie who will make love to anyone that wants it. It is the kind of cookie that seduces you into cheating with its insatiable good looks.

I will resist. I will not let that whore of a cookie deprive me of my happiness for the sake of a short wild fling.

It is nothing more than a common hussy. I deserve better. So do you.

Be healthy!

Alan

Inspired

Hi Everyone!

Do you ever wake up inspired? It doesn't happen to me a lot but this morning it did. I woke up (at 4AM) and the first thing I thought was...I want to write my blog. It has been too long!

How have you all been?

I am doing great. I guess that shouldn't be that surprising. One always feels more inspired when they feel great don't they?

I can honestly say that I have been good...no wait...I have been practically perfect for 7\seven days now. I can only say "practically" perfect because I had some free samples at the Costco demo tables yesterday.

I have also gone for a couple of visits to see my friends Stacey and Lauren for a couple of colonics at VitaLife Digestive Wellness Clinic so I am getting cleaned right out. I know I know...some of you are thinking that is information you didn't need to know but if you want to be healthy and protect against future disease I highly recommend them.

Lauren made an interesting comment when I was there.

I was talking to her about how I always seem to do so well and then seem to sabotage myself. She said she could relate (although she does not have a weight issue that I am aware of) as she does the same type of thing. She thinks it is because she likes the challenge of starting something new.

That, my friends, was an eye opening thought for me. Maybe that is part of my issue. I am always saying "change" keeps me going, but maybe there is a downside to it. Perhaps I can actually sabotage myself in the quest for a new challenge. Definitely food for thought (no pun intended).

I still thing change is critical to success though. Boredom will always send you travelling down the wrong path.

Anyway...I just had to pop my smiling face back into the picture and say that I am alive, well, and feeling inspired. I hope you are too.

Be healthy!

Alan

P.S. I big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my sister Sondra today :-)

You Are Perfect

Hi All!

This is a bit of a "Part 2" to my blog titled "You Are Beautiful".

The message is the same. You are perfect and you are beautiful.

Why I am I writing about the same thing? Because I can't get this song out of my head. It touches too close to home and I know it touches the hearts of a lot of us who have gone through life with weight issues and/or other issues and all the prejudice associated with it.

The lyrics are below:

Pink – F**kin’ Perfect (Clean Version) Lyrics

Made a wrong turn
Once or twice
Dug my way out
Blood and fire
Bad decisions
That’s alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, missunderstood
Miss, no way it’s all good
It didn’t slow me down
Mistaken
Always second guessing
Underestimated
Look, I’m still around…

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you’re nothing
You are perfect to me

You’re so mean
When you talk
About yourself
You are wrong
Change the voices
In your head
Make them like you
Instead
So complicated
Look how big you’ll make it
Filled with so much hatred
Such a tired game
It’s enough
I’ve done all i can think of
Chased down all my demons
see you do the same

Pretty, pretty please
Don’t you ever, ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please
If you ever, ever feel
Like you’re nothing
You are perfect to me

The whole world stares while i swallow the fear
The only thing i should be drinking is an ice cold beer
So cool in lying and we tried tried tried
But we try too hard, it’s a waste of my time
Done looking for the critics, cuz they’re everywhere
They don’t like my genes, they don’t get my hair
Strange ourselves and we do it all the time
Why do we do that?
Why do I do that?
Why do I do that?

Ooh, pretty pretty pretty,
Pretty pretty please don’t you ever ever feel
Like you’re less than
less than perfect
Pretty pretty please if you ever ever feel
Like you’re nothing
you are perfect to me
You’re perfect
You’re perfect to me
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you’re less than, less than perfect
Pretty, pretty please if you ever ever feel
like you’re nothing
you are perfect to me

There really isn't much for me to say that can top the words of this song.

The bottom line it that we are all on a journey. It doesn't matter where we are on that journey...love yourself now.

Be healthy!

Alan

P.S The video of this song can be viewed at: 

Listen to the Video/Song here

YOU ARE PERFECT!!!

I Weighed In

In yesterday's blog I was trying to decide whether or not I would weigh in at Weight Watchers. I decided to do it and I am 204 pounds. That is exactly the weight I said I though I was on Monday.

It still freaks me out that 204 pounds is possible for me without looking excessively overweight. Working out is good.

I am thinking that I am going to compromise on the weight thing. I am going to weigh in like a good boy and have Weight Watchers record it weekly but unless I am really feeling out of control I am going to tell them I only want them to tell me my weight once a month. 

It is the best of both worlds. I can review my situation on a monthly basis while keeping it honest and shifting the focus away from the scale. I am liking this concept.

On another note I got inspired by Marilyn Dennis on the radio yesterday. She was talking about portion control but not in the sense that we normally think of. She wasn't talking so much about how much is on the plate but was referring to how much goes in the mouth at a time.

I think a lot of people with weight issues (myself included) are fast eaters...and we tend to have large "bite" sizes. 

I know I do...especially when I am hungry. So for this week I am going to try and focus on how much I am actually putting in my mouth at a time. 

Tomorrow may be my last blog for a little while but I promise I will not be going AWOL on you again. I am having laser eye surgery done Friday afternoon so it may be a few days before I can see clearly and even if I can I am supposed to limit my exposure to the computer etc. for a bit.

Whether you like it or not though...I will be back!

Be healthy!

Alan